A passenger on a Jet Airways fight from Kolkata to Mumbai boarded the plane and typed out a private message to a friend on his phone “Terrorist on flight. I destroy women’s hearts“. A co-passenger saw this and informed the crew, and though the passenger said that it was only a prank, he was taken off the plane and sent to the police, thereby missing his flight. I don’t know what happened to him thereafter.
This is the latest example, after the Abhijit Iyer-Mitra’s extraordinary case, which demonstrates that it is dangerous nowadays to joke in India. Wit, irony and sarcasm can all be risky business.
It was not always so in India. For instance, at one time Sikhs used to enjoy Sardarji jokes and many would tell those jokes themselves. But then some Sikhs filed a petition in the Supreme Court seeking a ban on such jokes. Evidently, now Indians have developed a short fuse.
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The Supreme Court appointed a panel for laying down guidelines about Sikh jokes. But the panel’s chairman, retired Supreme Court judge Justice H.S. Bedi (a Sikh himself), said he enjoyed Sardar jokes and submitted in his report that they cannot be banned.
I have some personal experience in the matter of how humour in India can get you into trouble. I cracked two jokes on Biharis on Facebook.
(1) Since Pakistanis were demanding Kashmir, Prime Minister Atal Bihari Vajpayee made an offer to Gen Musharraf at the Agra summit that he is willing to give Kashmir but on the condition that Pakistan takes Bihar also. At this Musharraf folded his hands and fell at Vajpayee’s feet, apologising profusely, and promising never to demand Kashmir again.
(2) The famous Urdu poet Firaq Gorakhpuri once went to Bihar to attend a mushaira. Since the audience could not understand his Urdu verses they started hooting. At this Firaq, who had a short temper, remarked “Hindustan ko khatra Pakistan se nahin hai. Bihar se hai“. (India faces a threat not from Pakistan but from Bihar). This is a true story, I am told.
An uproar
Within a short time of posting these two jokes on Facebook, there was an uproar in Bihar. Huge processions were taken out by political leaders, my effigies were burnt. Maybe if I were in Bihar, I would have been burnt too.
Even chief minister Nitish Kumar condemned me. An FIR was filed somewhere in Bihar against me. Though I think the police officer in charge of the station had a sense of humour and dropped the matter, as I never heard of it thereafter.
I met Meira Kumar, former Union minister and former Lok Sabha speaker at Delhi airport some time later. Since she is from Bihar, I told her that I was only joking. She smiled, and said, “Don’t come to Bihar for some time.”
I quickly posted an apology to people from Bihar on Facebook, saying that I was only joking and only then did matters cool down.
Bihar Chief Minister Nitish Kumar. Credit: PTI
I similarly joked about Odias, and that too landed me in trouble.
Some Odias had requested that I write something about Odisha. So I wrote this on Facebook:
“Some Odias have asked me to write something about Odias. What is there to say about these poor chaps? Ever since the thrashing they got at the hands of Emperor Ashok in the battle of Kalinga they have been a dejected lot. Now all they have with them are pots (Patras), big pots (Mahapatras) and supposedly intelligent kings (Patnaiks).
And of course they also have Lord Jagannath to whom they pray every day for revenge against the abominable Biharis.
Hari Om”
My earlier experience with jokes about Bihar prompted me to include a postscript: “Odias, this is only a joke. So please don’t file a case against me.”
Yet, there was an uproar in Odisha against me and again processions were taken out and effigies burnt.
Again, I had to apologise.
Not everyone lacks a sense of humour
But not all Indians are lacking a sense of humour.
For instance, I once posted on Facebook, “Are there a lot of cobras in Nagaland? I won’t mind being bitten (or smitten) by a Nagin.”
Nagas who are on Facebook enjoyed this and took no offence.
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Similarly, when I wrote “Tamilians cannot think, they can only tink” (in Tamil there are no aspirated consonants), Tamilians took no offence, nor did the people of MP when I wrote, “All I know of Madhya Pradesh is that there is a Chambal Ghati there full of dacoits.”
If Sikhs forgive me, I may relate a Sardarji joke. A young Sardar was invited to a dinner party. The invitation card mentioned ‘Black tie only’. When our friend reached the party, he found people wearing shirts and trousers and jackets too.
And to conclude, I may crack a joke on my own community, Kashmiris.
In the days of the Kashmir maharaja, the Kashmir army had Dogras, Sikhs, etc. but no Kashmiris. So the Kashmiris had a grievance, and their demand was accepted and a regiment of Kashmiri recruits was raised. However, when this regiment was ordered to go to the front, they refused, saying that first arrangements should be made for their security. At this, the Maharaja disbanded the regiment.
(Kashmiris, this is only a joke, so please don’t take offence).
Markandey Katju is a former judge of the Supreme Court of India.